This is one of saddest things I have ever written. I am addicted to pretty patterns and colors and intricate designs and button down tops and…hold on, I’m getting emotional…But I have to address this because pretty soon I will be moving to Seattle to work in an elementary school for Americorps, living on like 1000 a month (which basically will all go to rent and food). And gurlll, I’m already feeling the shopping withdrawal symptoms.
I have a pillow that has “Gatsby taste on a Carraway budget” printed on it. I don’t think I can describe my dilemma any better than that. I have about 15 things in my Kate Spade online cart that I will not be able to afford for another 10 to 15 years. Will someone explain why I torture myself so?
The other day, I went into Victoria’s Secret during my break from work. (note: Do NOT work in a mall if you are a shopaholic. just don’t do it) I can usually restrain myself from buying the cute lace bras by reminding myself that I already have a killer galaxy print bra at home that I’m in love with. But this time, I found an amazing silky robe. And it was flawless. And I needed it. I asked the sales lady a question about the sizing, and because she was watching me, I had to say “I’ve been shopping too much, so I’ll leave it here and if I keep thinking about it, I’ll come back another time.” I think that conversation was actually what kept my mind on that darling blue robe for the rest of my shift at Teavana. So two hours later, I was waiting for the bus home and couldn’t help gravitating towards Victoria’s Secret. (Telling this story is really making me feel like a serious addict) I picked up the robe quickly, hoping to avoid the judging eyes of the sales lady I talked to earlier, and went over to the fitting room. LOLZ guess who was working there. Chris, the sales lady. She looked at me and said”Oh you’re back….and you picked it up, that didn’t take long at all wow!” and she hooted with laughter and stomped her foot like some amused zebra. (cringe attack) I still got the robe though.
Welp, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. The real issue, though, is really that I don’t want to give up my impulse buys. I love fashion and design, so really everything I buy does make me happy. It’s sad- I thought getting a job would allow me to shop when I wanted, but I have to save most of it to get to Seattle. Screw volunteering, why am I trying to help the world? I want new makeup.